Trading Places
by polysgirl
Summary: Steph sees more than she bargained for while on stakeout. Oneshot. BABE.


A challenge piece. The challenge was to start with the line in bold and italics.

Disclaimer: I own nothing! Just did this for fun.

TRADING PLACES 

_**I saw him. I was watching from the passenger side window and he didn't see me… but I saw him. He was kissing another woman.**_

I had been slouched in the seat and drumming my fingers on the dash, doing surveillance on a skip when he drove up in a car I didn't recognize. We'd been sitting in shadows for the better part of the day, and I was bored spitless. Or at least, I had been until I spotted him getting out of the car, and knocking on a door about a half block away. And then the door opened, and he grabbed a woman by the arm and pulled her onto the step. I had no idea who she was, and I didn't really care. I cared more about the fact that her hands were under his shirt before she was even outside, and that as soon as she was on the steps with him, he had crushed her to him and shoved his tongue down to the back of her throat.

Oh yes, I could tell that from here. And I knew what it felt like when he kissed that way. And there was no way he was supposed to be kissing HER like that!

My arm shot out and I was poised to go flying out the door to let him have it with all guns, including my real one, the fucking lying bastard. But I couldn't, because then I risked ruining an entire six hours worth of work, and botching a rather important job. Fuck! I thought as I snatched my hand away from the door, my fingers clenching and unclenching despite themselves. He said he loved me. Loved ME! If he loved me, what the hell was he doing, shoving his pelvis into that bitch, with her grasping his ass, pulling him closer.

I couldn't tear my gaze away, as she pulled the rest of his shirt out of his pants, running her hands over those abs, those muscles, that body that was to die for. And then she was unzipping his pants, cupping him. Finally, he maneuvered them into the house, and the door closed behind them.

I sat in silence, twisting my hands together as I clenched and unclenched them, swallowing convulsively as I tried to rein in my emotions. There's no room for emotion. Push emotion aside and deal with the situation as it stands. Well fuck that! The only reason I wasn't flying in there is because he wouldn't be happy to know I was here, at all, and I know he hadn't seen us. I wanted to leave. I want to go in there and rip his eyes out. I wanted to go home, crawl under my bed, and never come out.

Instead, we sat in tense silence, watching the house we were here for, and, well, I watched the other house too. I was waiting for him to come out, maybe quickly, with some sort of explanation. Maybe it was a mistake. No. Her hand was in his pants, for crissakes. It wasn't a mistake.

I lost track of how long we sat there, but he still hadn't come out when the page on the console buzzed. I glanced at it as the man beside me reached for it, checked it, then put the car in gear.

"Your skip's at Shorty's." He told me. I guess that meant we'd sat here for nothing. Or maybe not for absolutely nothing.

"Did you know?" I asked, finally. God knows Ranger AND his Merry Men knew everything.

"Yeah." He finally said, after a long silence.

"How long?"

There was silence. Finally he cringed. "Since about two months after Scrog."

"Did you know he'd be there?"

"If I did, we wouldn't have been there." He told me. And that was the end of the conversation. God knows, I was used to it. If I wanted conversation on stake-outs I had to take Lula. But this skip was dangerous, and both Tank and Ranger balked at the idea of Lula being my backup. They both insisted I have good help for this guy. Funny thing is, they were so worried about one of us getting hurt. This hurt me more than any physical injury ever could. We drove the four blocks to Shorty's in silence. I focussed on my anger, because if I didn't, I knew I would cry.

54321

I sat on the curb, my hand pressed to the side of my head, trying to staunch the blood. As bad days go, this ones takes the cake, I thought. 'When it rains, it pours" I mumbled dismally to myself, then realized that it was the wrong thing to say as it started to drizzle lightly. As takedowns went, I suppose it was fairly successful, but not a very good one when it came down to it. My head throbbed, and I wasn't sure if the tickling trickle through my fingers was blood or rain. I closed my eyes, and tried to find the road to the land of denial, but it was nowhere to be found. I was lost.

"Babe." He sat down beside me, grasping my wrist in his hands. I tried to pull away but he just tightened his fingers, his grip remaining gentle as he separated my hand from my head and peered at the wound. "Shit, Steph."

"The skip ready to go?"

"Minor issue. Gotta wait for the cops." He said. Then his voice hardened. "Next time-" He was cut off as a vehicle peeled into the lot and up to them, Joe leaping out as soon as it was in park.

"Stephanie what the HELL do you think you're doing? Can't you stay out of trouble for one god-damned day? Christ, I can't afford the Maalox." He snarled, reaching for my hand to pull me towards him. I jumped back, avoiding him, but tripped off of the curb and fell, sprawling backwards on my ass. I sat, stunned, looking up at the two men in front of me; Joe's angry face, and Ranger's blank one.

"So don't afford the Maalox, Joe." I finally said my voice sounding less pissed than I wanted, and sad enough to embarass me. "I don't think you need it anymore anyways." I added, as I ignored the hand Ranger had offered me, and pulled myself to my feet.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean? You're here, with HIM, in another situation he gets you in, apprenhending a skip you aren't even qualified to talk to, let alone put cuffs on. Your head is bleeding. It probably needs stitches. And I'm supposed to not be getting an ulcer? My future wife, the future mother of my future children, is out here risking her life, and it's not supposed to bother me."

I swallowed. Did I? Didn't I? I kicked a stone as hard as I could, sending it skipping into the street, then looked up at him. "So..you expect me to sit at home, taking care of our kids?"

"Well, at least you'd be safe." Joe ground out.

"So..I'm supposed to sit at home, take care of the kids, and be the perfect Burg housewife with no life, while you run around screwing the woman who's good enough to suck you off, but not to be your wife? Why the hell can't SHE wash your tighty-whities????" I ended in a shriek.

"So...what...You're running around fucking Manoso here, but it's the end of the world if I get some on the side? Nice double standard there, Cupcake." He spat.

"I have NEVER slept with Ranger at any point during our relationship." I ground out, clenching and unclenching my fists, even as my head pounded and spun.

"Right. You just play tonsil hockey with every man you meet. Come one. You're coming with me."

"Fuck you, Joe. Go back to your whore, and leave me alone." I snarled, spun on my heel, and started walking.

"The only whore is you, Stephanie." Joe screamed after me. "Walk away from me now, and it's over! I won't take you back!"

I stopped, and turned back to face him. "It's been over from the minute I saw you walk into her house." I said, slowly and deliberately, just loud enough for him to hear me. Then I turned, and kept walking, only dimly aware of the sound of crunch of bone and Joe screaming threats.

I guess I should have saw it coming, I thought, as I focussed on the cracks in the sidewalk and placing one foot in front of the other. Afterall, I had let Ranger kiss me. But never farther. But still..it really didn't make me any better. But did it matter? I wondered. There was obviously something inherently wrong with me if the men in my life all strayed elsewhere, so who cares if I kissed someone else? It's not like he really loved me, anyway. Hell, it's not like either of them really love me. I stomped hard in a puddle, sending water spraying up and getting myself even wetter in the process. The rain was coming down heavier now, and I couldn't remember where I was, or why there was blood on my hands. The only thing I could remember was Joe, and the woman, and Joe's words. And the only place I wanted to be was in bed.

The black SUV we'd been in for surveillance pulled up beside me, and the passenger side window rolled down. I kept walking. I didn't want to deal with him, either. I knew he'd punched Joe, and part of me was glad; I didn't think I deserved the whore comment. But the rest of me just wanted both men to fuck off and leave me alone. I wasn't good enough for either of them, and I was tired of the games.

"Babe. Get in." Ranger's voice was soft, but loud enough to carry through to me. He wasn't demanding, just requesting. I shook my head, and kept walking. "Stephanie." he rolled the car slowly along as I moved. Finally I stopped and spun around.

"Look. I've been played for a fool, thrown into a wall and split my head, and been called to task by Joe after falling on my ass in the rain. You've gotten your entertainment for the day, and now you can leave." And I turned and kept walking, fighting back tears. I wasn't going to cry, no way no how, not until I was in my own apartment, in the shower, or in my bed.

"Steph." He repeated, the SUV still rolling along beside me. "You've got a gash on your head that's still bleeding and probably need stitches. You're miles from the hospital AND your apartment. Come on. You need a ride."

"No." I said. "I don't need anything." And I walked. I never took my eyes off my feet, even though I was painfully aware of the fact that Ranger wasn't leaving me. His presence was poking me, stabbing at my already torn open heart, twisting more. "Fucking men." I growled under my breath. I slammed on the brakes and spun to face Ranger again. "Alright. Listen. I'm done with this, Ok?" I told him, my voice rising. "I don't know what's wrong with me, what makes me not good enough. But I'm tired of it. I'm not a toy. I don't know what makes me fall in love with a man who can't accept me for who I am, and another who doesn't want me. But I'm not doing it anymore. I'm done. Goodbye, Ranger." I spun, and I ran. I ran a half a block before my head started to pulse, and pound, and spin. Fuck. I forgot about my head. I slowed to a walk as the SUV pulled past me, driving away in the rain.

Thank God, I thought. I was having a harder and harder time keeping myself together. My head throbbed and I was starting to feel distinctly lightheaded. Keeping my eyes on the cracks, I started to count sidewalk squares, slowly and deliberately, timing my breathing to keep my emotions under control.

Probably I should have paid more attention to where I was going. Probably if I had been, I would have noticed where the SUV went. But I didn't, so when I ran into Ranger - literally ran into him, plowing headfirst into his chest, I let out a startled squeak. His arms came up around me, and I immediately started to fight him.

"What part of Goodbye don't you get?" I spat out, placing both hands against his chest and shoving him. He rocked back on his heels, but stood his ground.

"Who doesn't want you?" He asked quietly, his hands on my shoulders, preventing my escape.

"Oh, as if you don't know. Let me go. I'm leaving."

"Babe." His voice was like a caress, and it sliced through my heart.

"Ranger. Don't. Please." I begged, blinking hard to hold myself together. "You want to kiss me, mess around, sure. I'm entertainment, might as well keep me in your life so you can get some amusement during the day. But there's no commitment. Not because you can't, but because you won't. If you wanted me, you would. If you really wanted me, you would have never sent me back to Joe." I had started to babble, to ramble, spilling things I'd alwasy kept inside. And as I did, my voice got higher and higher, more and more hysterical, and I couldn't find a way to stop it. I was detached from myself, no longer able to control my reactions or my words. "If Joe wanted me, REALLY wanted me, he wouldn't have been at that house today. And if you had any respect for me, if you cared about me, you would have told me. You said you knew. You KNEW!" I sobbed. "And you didn't tell me. And then we sat there. And you didn't say anything."

"I didn't know what to say." Ranger said, before I could continue.

"You sat there. And we didn't leave. And you knew. And we were there anyways. And if you knew, why didn't you tell me. Scrog was a half year ago! That means this has been going on for FOUR months! And you knew, and you didn't tell me. Why didn't you tell me?" I was crying, sobbing outright, pissed at myself for it, but at the same time, too hurt to care. That was what hurt the most, that this man that I loved, whose integrity I respected so much, couldn't even respect ME enough to... "Why didn't you tell me I was being played for a fool?" I asked, shoving against his chest again. I was shaking too hard to do more than nudge, though.

"I didn't know how. I didn't think..I didn't think it was a good idea. It a was stupid decision." He whispered, drawing me into his arms and holding me tightly to him.

"It wasn't just for entertainment?" I forced myself to ask.

"No. God, Babe, forget I ever said that. It was stupid of me." He groaned.

"Yeah. Right. You don't do stupid, remember?" I said into his neck, shuddering as I tried to bring myself under control.

"Where you're concerned, everything I do seems to be stupid." He muttered. His voice sounded pained, and I looked up at him in surprise. My nose was running and I took a swipe at it with my hands, but my hand was so wet that it didn't do any good.

"Like telling me to go back to Morelli?" I asked, then cursed myself as I hiccupped.

"Especially that." He pressed his lips to my forehead, and I leaned against him.

"My head hurts." I whispered.

"Come on, Babe. Lets get you to the hospital. We'll talk later." He tucked me up against him, and we walked around the corner to where he parked the SUV. He had to help me into the passenger side, then he went around. As soon as we were buckled in, he took my hand, lacing his fingers with mine, and placed it on his thigh. He didn't let go of me until we were parked at the hospital, and then stayed with me while they cleaned and stitched my head. I didn't remember much, except leaning against him and being glad that he didn't listen to me when I told him to wait in the waiting room.

I dozed in the SUV when we left the hospital, and didn't wake until Ranger was carefully lifting me out. We were in the Rangeman garage, and I looked up at him, confused. "Why didn't you take me home?"

"Concussion, Babe."

I thought about that. I didn't think it was that bad, probably I could have gone home. But I didn't want to. And probably Ranger knew that. I accepted his excuse and we rode in silence to the 7th floor apartment.

I showered, quickly, avoiding getting my stitches wet, then pulled on one of Ranger's T-shirts and crawled into his bed. He came into the room shortly after, kissed my forehead, and ducked into the shower himself.

I was dozing when he slid into bed beside me and wrapped me in his arms, cradling me up against him. "I love you, Steph." He whispered, his hand rubbing a slow circle on my back.

I figured it was now, or never. "What are we?" I asked him.

His hand stilled. "You need to get over Morelli. I love you, Stephanie. And I want you. But a relationship with me wouldn't be easy. You need to get over Morelli, and then decide if you want to try, really try."

I burried my face in his neck and breathed, his scent soothing me. But I couldn't keep the insecurities from spinning 'round and round in my head. What if..How did I know..

"Hey. what's burning?" He asked gently, his hand coming up to massage my neck.

"Am I good enough for you?" I asked, hesitating. I hoped saying it out loud was the right choice.

Ranger shifted, and tipped my chin up so I met his eyes. "You're perfect, Babe. You're my light."


End file.
